MV Quick Tip: How to Keep His Attention (Without Scaring Him Away!)
If you’re wondering how to keep a man that you like interested in you, you’ll love this Quick Tip!
In love, little things make a big difference. In the day-to-day of your relationship(s), it can feel overwhelming to address all the problems or create all your dreams at once. That's why we love to bring you these quick tips. Something accessible you can try on and experiment with. It might be new, it might be a helpful reminder, and it might be totally counterintuitive. We invite you to play along.
When you’re dating and meet someone you really like, it’s natural to get excited and want to move things forward. But you also want to know and feel he’s interested in you. So how can you keep his attention without being or doing “too much?”
In this post, you’ll learn how to keep his attention without pushing or scaring him away.
You’ve been there before.
You connect with a man you really like, have a couple of great dates, and then suddenly… his interest seems to wane.
But you like him and want to see him, so, you think, you’ll just take the lead for once.
Yet the more you lean in, the more he pulls back, and you’re tired of spinning your wheels.
You know you’re great so why does he get less interested the minute you show that you are?
It can be frustrating and painful, but understanding why this happens requires understanding the two kinds of interest:
ACTIVE INTEREST
and
RECEPTIVE INTEREST
Because a man’s interest in a woman can only grow when he feels actively interested.
If he only feels receptively interested in her, his interest will tend to decline slowly.
Meanwhile, if a woman pursues a man with active interest, it makes him receptively interested.
Although he likes receiving her interest, warmth, and affection, it does not make him more interested in her.
It is his active interest in her and her receptive interest in him that will bring out the best in a man.
If he is only receptively interested in you, then he becomes interested in someone else who promises to bring out the best in him.
Likewise, being pursued by a man who is actively interested will bring out the best in a woman.
When a man is actively interested in a woman, it gives her an opportunity to explore her true and authentic responses to his pursuit.
This authenticity also makes her more attractive to the right kind of guy for her.
It is a woman’s receptive interest in a man that generates his active interest in her.
Women, you want to be proactively receptive.
So if you’re finding yourself doing extra little thoughtful things for him, that’s very sweet but that is active interest.
And your receptive interest is what generates his active interest in you.
To clarify the differences —
Active Interest:
- Has a goal in mind
- Comes from a place of desire & confidence
- Wants to serve
Meanwhile, Receptive Interest:
- Considers the value of what’s being offered
- Comes from a place of preference and worthiness
- Wants to be served
So, in order to keep a man’s ACTIVE interest, you want to stay proactively RECEPTIVE.
For example:
- Don’t pursue, let him pursue you
- If he doesn’t call you for a date, send him an FYI or SOS text
- Create a space for him to pay the check whenever possible
- Don’t ask too many questions, instead share more on the date
- Make sure you share what you like to do rather than always do what he wants to do
- Before getting physically naked, make sure you feel safe to get emotionally and mentally naked
- Check all your tendencies to be a “people pleaser,” allow him to please you
It’s important that you don’t make yourself feel bad for being actively interested in the past. But now, you have an opportunity to do dating differently.
With this new understanding, you can create a whole new dating experience; one where you explore the potential of a relationship while also having a good time and allowing yourself to be served.
Remember, thriving in love doesn’t have to be complicated. Just keep learning and taking small steps because you deserve a great relationship!
Grow in love,
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