MV Quick Tip: How to Balance the “Burden” in a Relationship

If you’ve been feeling like it’s YOU who’s carrying the burden of all the problems in your relationship, today’s MarsVenus Quick Tip is for you.

In love, little things make a big difference. In the day-to-day of your relationship(s), it can feel overwhelming to address all the problems or create all your dreams at once. That's why we love to bring you these quick tips. Something accessible you can try on and experiment with. It might be new, it might be a helpful reminder, and it might be totally counterintuitive. We invite you to play along.

In order to experience more mutuality in handling the problems in your relationship, we want to introduce you to the concept of “tunnel vision.”

Because both partners are equally responsible for creating a good relationship, but their roles are completely different.

In the post below, you’ll learn how men and women identify and address the problems in a relationship differently, so you can confidently own your role and get the reciprocity you’re hoping for.

Men and women don’t have the same natural awareness of relationship problems.

Women are naturally gifted with an intuitive awareness of the needs of others.

But men are different, and tend to experience “tunnel vision.”

Men deal with what is right in front of them and don’t have the same intuitive awareness, so they don’t see or feel the problems in the same way that women do.

So while the man often thinks everything is fine in the relationship, the woman is burdened by her awareness of all the problems.

If the man is also acting as if everything is fine, this makes things even worse!

The woman may then...

• Mistakenly assume that he is happy with the relationship and isn’t open to any changes
• Get the message that she is much too demanding
• Falsely believe that he doesn’t care and will never do anything to change

This is why it’s so important for the man in the relationship to be willing to hear and validate her feminine awareness.

Because if he denies the validity of her needs and perceptions, she then feels alone and unsupported, as though the success of the relationship and family rests solely on her shoulders.

No wonder women become frustrated when men act as though everything is fine!

With this new understanding of tunnel vision, here’s what we recommend:

If you’re the woman in a relationship, remember that your partner only appears satisfied because he is unconscious of the problems.

If he were aware of the problems, he could understand more and be motivated to improve things.

Instead, ask him to listen to your awareness and communicate the support you’d like to make your relationship more enjoyable, easeful, and fulfilling.

And men, be willing to listen and validate her perspective. 

She has a special gift of intuition and awareness that will only help strengthen your bond and intimacy.

Women: Is it important to develop the communication skills necessary to communicate your needs in a way a man can hear them? Absolutely!

Men: Is it important to develop the skills to listen to a woman so that she can fully trust you and appreciate you for all you bring to her life? Absolutely.

But with this insight into “tunnel vision” and acknowledging what our partner brings to the table, you can take a greater step toward even more loving fulfillment.

Remember, thriving in love doesn’t have to be complicated. Just keep learning and taking small steps because you deserve a great relationship!

Grow in love,